
How to Support a Friend Who Has Experienced Sexual or Domestic Violence
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When someone you care about reveals they’ve experienced sexual or domestic violence, it can be difficult to know how to respond. Your support is invaluable, but offering it with care, respect, and empathy is essential. Here’s how you can help:
1. Listen Without Judgment
The most powerful thing you can do is listen. Let them share their story at their own pace. Avoid asking too many questions or pushing for details. Just be present and let them know they are heard.
2. Believe Them
One of the most validating responses you can give is to simply believe your friend. Avoid skepticism or doubt. Trust their words and reaffirm that they did nothing wrong.
3. Avoid Blame or Unsolicited Advice
It’s natural to want to offer solutions, but it’s important to avoid making assumptions about what they should do. Saying things like "You should leave" or "Why didn’t you report it?" can make them feel judged. Focus on their needs, not your perspective.
4. Offer Practical Support
Ask how you can help in practical ways. Whether it’s accompanying them to appointments, providing information about support services, or simply being a shoulder to lean on, practical help can be incredibly comforting.
5. Encourage Professional Help
Gently suggest professional support like counseling, support groups, or organizations that help survivors. Let them know it’s okay to seek help and that it doesn’t make them weak.
6. Respect Their Privacy
Your friend has trusted you with something deeply personal. Keep their story confidential unless they give you permission to share it or it’s necessary for their safety.
7. Be Patient
Healing is a process that takes time. There will be ups and downs, and your friend may not always want to talk. That’s okay. Let them know you’re there for them whenever they’re ready.
8. Take Care of Yourself
Supporting someone through trauma can be emotionally draining. Make sure you’re also caring for your own well-being and seeking support if needed.
Resources
- National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-SAFE (7233)
- RAINN (Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network): 1-800-656-HOPE (4673)
- Local Shelters and Support Services
At The Women Before Me, our mission is to help build a world where no woman or girl feels alone. Your compassion and kindness can make a world of difference. Together, we can create a future of empowerment and healing. Learn more.